magic and mayhem 01 - switching hour Read online

  No. Stop. I was lip-locking with no one for the rest of my life…

  The sexy sounds coming from deep within his chest made it hard to breathe as I wantonly opened my legs to him.

  "I'll try to go slow," he said as he bit down on his bottom lip.

  In a haze of almost painful lust I realized I was jealous of his teeth. I wanted to bite his lip. WTF?

  "Slow is for weenies," I hissed as he pushed the head of his cock into my very willing and very ready body. However, he was right. He was huge. "Is that thing going to fit?"

  His decidedly masculine chuckle shot through me and my body bucked wildly beneath his. "It'll fit," he assured me and he pressed deeper inside. "You were made for me."

  "Enough of that talk," I said. "Just do me."

  "As the lady wishes." He sheathed himself completely and my body clamped around his like a vise. His lazy and predatory smile sent me over the edge, along with a feeling of fullness that bordered on the line between pleasure and pain.

  "Oh my hell," I gasped and he stilled.

  "Are you okay, baby?" he whispered in my ear.

  "More than okay," I burst out. "Are you just gonna lie there or are you gonna move?"

  All bets were now off.

  He moved. Oh my Goddess, how he moved. His beautiful mouth pulled into an evil, sexy smirk as his body powered into mine. I was losing all rational thought and I had no clue where he began or where I ended. This was not just sex. It was life changing and I was as terrified as I was turned on.

  His breathing was harsh and his eyes blazed as he branded me. I shrieked at the invasion of my body and soul and gave back as good as I was getting.

  "If you mate with me I will tear your balls off after I have a mind-shattering orgasm," I panted. The sensitivity was almost too much to bear. My entire body trembled as he took me like the animal he was… and I freakin' loved it.

  My need for him was alarming. My nails raked his back and my hips met every thrust with joyful abandon. I wanted to crawl inside him and stay. His face contorted as the speed became something that probably should have killed me dead.

  A deafening roar crashed through my head and my own screams of ecstasy sounded distant. However, the mantra being whispered in my ear was clear and as exciting as any words ever uttered.

  "Mine. You're mine," Mac repeated in rhythm with his thrusts.

  "No," I told him on a ragged breath as my toes curled with passion. "I belong to no one."

  His hips pistoned even faster and our lovemaking became frenzied. Our bodies slapped together as our moans and cries tangled. This was the best thing and the worst thing that ever could have happened to me. My magic surrounded us and cocooned us. A rainbow of sparkling mist rained down and made what was already intense absolutely insane.

  "Come. Now," he demanded.

  As much as I wanted to be in control I was no longer there. This man—this wolf—owned me and I would give him whatever he wanted.

  I came. Hard.

  He threw back his head and roared as he joined me, which sent my woowoo into a second violent orgasm. Colorful bursts of sparkles exploded around us. I screamed so loudly I was sure the entire countryside would hear.

  "Oh my god," Mac muttered as he tried to catch his breath. "That was unreal."

  I was a mute noodle squished underneath a huge wolf-man. "Having a hard time breathing here," I choked out as my body still twitched with mini orgasmic aftershocks.

  "Sorry." He chuckled as he rolled over and pulled my naked, weak and very happy body on top of his.

  He wrapped his arms around me tightly as I tried to pull away.

  "No. Stay with me," he whispered as his eyes bored into mine.

  I wasn't sure if he meant right now or forever, but I wasn't going to ask for clarification. It was too scary.

  "That was, um… awesome," I blurted out. It was much safer than blurting out I might be falling for him. Why in the hell was that thought in my brain? I'd known him for all of an hour. He could be a serial killer. This was the stuff ridiculous romance novels were made of. I was a witch with a shitty romantic track record who didn't even know the real meaning of love.

  "I've waited for you a long time," he said as he brushed my wild auburn curls from my face.

  "That's just silly," I said breathlessly. "You know nothing about me."

  "Oh, but I do. Your Aunt Hildy talked about you so often I feel like I know you."

  I rolled my eyes and made a sound of disdain. "My Aunt Hildy never laid eyes on me. How would she know the first thing about me?"

  "Your father."

  Now I was mad. "He doesn't know me either," I snapped and tried to roll away from Mac, but he held me close. "My father took off before I was born."

  "He knows you," Mac said. "And he loves you."

  Mind-shattering orgasms and hearing that a man I didn't know supposedly loved me and spoke fondly of me was simply more than I could take at the moment.

  "Fairy tales," I muttered as I buried my face in Mac's collarbone. "If my father was around me he would have shown himself. If he really loved me he would have let me know."

  "Sometimes things are far more complicated than that. Sometimes things happen when least expected."

  "Just don't tell me you're my father and we're fine," I joked as I again tried to extricate myself. Again, no go. Mac wasn't turning me loose.

  "Okay." He laughed and closed his eyes. "That was disgusting and I'm not anywhere near being your father. I'm your mate."

  "About that, Mac…" I started.

  "Say that again," he demanded.

  "Say what?"

  "My name. Say my name again."

  I realized I'd never said it until then. Of course I'd known him only for an hour, but… "Mac. Mac. Mac." His smile of joy made me giggle. "But seriously, I'm not a werewolf. This whole ‘I'm your mate’ thing doesn't fly with me."

  "But you are my mate," he said as if it was a done deal. "You're mine."

  "Um… nope. Clearly we work well in the sack—or on the floor—but we're going to have to date or something."

  "Date?" He was incredulous.

  "Yes. Date. You know, like go to dinner, make out in the back of the movie theatre, hold hands and go on walks. Stuff like that. However—full disclosure here, I'm crappy girlfriend material."

  "Do we get to keep having sex?" he asked as he mulled over my proposition, ignoring the warning.

  "Well, duh. Yes."

  "Okay. I can do that," he said as he slapped my ass and rolled me off of him. "We'll go on a date tomorrow night. You will wear no panties and a short skirt. We will ride my motorcycle and have sex by the river." He seemed quite pleased with his agenda.

  "Dude, you will not dictate how I dress. I have extremely sexy panties and I plan to wear them."

  "Can I rip them off with my teeth?" he inquired with a very naughty look in his eyes.

  I considered this request for two entire seconds before I agreed. "Yes, but you'll have to buy me new ones and they're not cheap."

  "Deal."

  Oh my Goddess, what had I gotten myself into?

  Chapter 11

  "That's your cat?" Mac asked as he eyed Fabio suspiciously. Fabio hissed and eyed him right back.

  "Yes, and you can't eat him. If you're hungry there are frozen pizzas in the fridge," I told Mac as we entered the kitchen. Thankfully, my gifts from the Shifters I'd healed were still in the basement. I refused to re-don bloody clothing. I was now sporting a hotter than hell Stella McCartney navy mini dress. Mac was delighted there were no panties in the stash and walked closely behind me as we mounted the stairs. He was a pig in wolf's clothing.

  "You don't cook?" he asked and raised an eyebrow.

  "Nope. And I have no plans to learn. Is that a problem for you?" I slapped my hands on my hips and waited for some chauvinistic remark to fly from his lips.

  "Nope. I have a cook already."

  "Is it a female?" I shouted. He was not going to have some wolfy bimbo cookin
g for him if I was anywhere in the picture.

  His grin of delight at my obvious jealousy almost split his face. "No. It's a man, sweetheart. You'll love him."

  "I have no plans to meet him. Ever," I shot back.

  "Uh huh, whatever you say." He bit down on his lip to hide his smile. "And just so you know, I don't eat cats. I don't eat other Shifters or anything magical. However, I'd be more than happy to eat you."

  He had rendered me speechless—very difficult to do. He was disgusting and I kind of loved it—not that I would ever let him know. "Out," I yelled. "You're leaving now."

  His laugh made me horny again, which only served to increase my anger.

  "I'll pick you up tomorrow at seven."

  "If you're lucky," I muttered under my breath.

  With a wink and a slap on my ass he left. Leaning on the closed door, I gulped in a deep breath and blew it out slowly between my lips. Mac was going to be a huge problem.

  "Heeeeee's not goood enough for you," Fabio sniffed disdainfully.

  "Somebody should probably tell him that," I said as I pulled myself together and ransacked the fridge for food. Sex made me hungry. There was nothing. Crap.

  "I ceeertainly hope you didn't sleeeep with him," he hissed as he attacked his sack.

  "No. We definitely didn't sleep."

  "Zeeelda," he whined. "You can do better than hiiiiim."

  "Fabio, how do you even know that? I'm not a prize. I'm a directionless witch on probation who's never maintained a relationship in my life." I plopped down on the sofa and let my head fall to my hands.

  "Youuuuu are beautiful, powerful, smaaaart and fuuuuullll of compassion. Some young man, hopefully a waaaarlock, will be lucky to haaaaave you someday."

  "You forgot materialistic and selfish. You know, you sound alarmingly like a parent instead of a familiar at the moment." I gave him the evil eyeball. "Well, not either of my parents. My mother didn't give a shit about me no matter how hard I tried and you know about my sperm donor."

  "Was it baaaad growing up with heeeer?"

  I glanced over and realized he really cared. "It was what it was. Regret and wallowing in self-pity are for pussies. No offense."

  "Nooone taken. From the gooossip I've heard, yourrrr sperm dooonor does care—greatly. He's just indisposed at theeeeee moment," he said quietly.

  "Yeah, well, that's awesome, but doesn't really do me any good. Can you whip up some food? I'm starved."

  "Cheeeeck the porch," he advised. "I thiiink you will be happy."

  ***

  Fabio was right and he was wrong. There was definitely food on the front porch, but it came with about fifty Shifters.

  Chuck and Bob were waving from the back of the crowd.

  Wanda and little Bo were organizing the dishes on a long table that had been set up on the front lawn.

  DeeDee was manning the grill with a bunch of other gals and the beer was flowing freely.

  WTF?

  "Surprise," Chuck shouted. He ambled over and trapped me in a hug that made breathing difficult.

  The term bear hug came to mind. Also the unappetizing thought of him bending my aunt over a chair...

  "You're having a picnic!" he bellowed with glee.

  "I can see that," I replied dryly. "Who in the hell are all these people?"

  "Shifters," the rabbit I'd repaired told me as he chugged a beer.

  "What's your name?" I asked him.

  "Roger."

  "You're joking." I bit down on the inside of my cheek to keep from laughing. He couldn't seriously be named Roger Rabbit.

  His eyes narrowed and his nose twitched. I was floored to realize even in his human form I could still tell he was a rabbit.

  "I wouldn't joke about that," he huffed as he stomped away.

  "You're making friends fast," Chuck observed with a grin.

  "Yeah, I'm good like that," I muttered as I took the beer from his hand and drank. "Are there any honey badgers here?"

  The entire crowd went silent and stared at me in horror. WTH? Wanda, Bo, Simon and a very handsome man hustled over.

  "Oh my dear," Wanda said. "We don't mix with the badgers or the hyenas. That would be deadly, especially now."

  "The badgers have put a bounty on your head for killing a fourth of their colony," Simon informed me as he gave me a quick loving hug.

  "Those little bastards were trying to kill Mac and me. What was I supposed to do?"

  Should I have run? No way. I did lose a fabu outfit, but the mind-blowing orgasm I got from the wolf I'd zapped and then saved had been worth it.

  "She popped the bastards like ticks," Chuck proudly announced to the crowd who began to applaud loudly. The chant started softly and then grew to proportions that made me uncomfortable.

  "Whis-per-er. Whis-per-er. Whis-per-er," they yelled.

  "Hold on, dudes," I shouted over the unruly group. "I'm just temporary."

  All the chanting stopped. That certainly shut them up.

  "I mean, um… I'm not your best witch and I, ahhh…"

  The shocked and sad looks on their faces made my stomach churn.

  "She's thinking about it," Simon chimed in, saving me from myself. "Plus, I'm fairly sure she just did the nasty with Mac!"

  The crowd went wild again for the second time in five minutes. WTF? Did Mac have a problem getting laid? I had a hard time believing that.

  "She's his mate!" the mountain lion bellowed joyously. "She said he smelled good!"

  Again with the screaming and cheering.

  A furious and beautiful blonde came tearing forward from the back of the group. She grabbed me by the hair, yanked my head to the side and examined my neck. "He didn't mark her," she grunted with satisfaction. "He's not mated to the witch."

  This situation was not working for me. At all. A ball of fury simmered in my gut. Blondie was fixing to go down. Shimmering gold fire engulfed my arms and chest. The Shifters gasped and Blondie jumped back in terror.

  "If you ever put your hands on me again," I growled, "I will remove them. As in blast them off of your arms. And for your information, I am not mated because I told him I would tear his nuts off if he mated with me. We're kind of sort of dating and if you even go near him I will zap your head bald and pop your enhanced chest. It will be permanent, so I suggest you watch your skanky butt around me. Understand?"

  "You're a witch," she informed me haughtily. "A witch could never keep a wolf satisfied."

  "You're a wolf?"

  "Yes," she crowed proudly. "I can handle his needs. Not you."

  "Interesting. That's not what he said when I was sitting on his face about an hour ago."

  The laughter from the peanut gallery made me grin. I took a quick bow, but Blondie screeched in fury. She growled and started to shift.

  She was actually going to attack me. At my house? At my picnic? Not happening.

  I pointed my fingers and zapped her mid-shift. I did warn her. She was now bald and a negative A cup.

  The crowd went crazy—jumping and screaming and high-fiving like idiots.

  "That was impressive," Simon congratulated me with a shit-eating grin on his cute face. "She's an evil bitch."

  "I had no choice. She was going to kill me," I said, still shocked at that simple fact and that I'd just disfigured her in front of all my neighbors. My stomach felt queasy and I grabbed on to Wanda for support.

  Blondie lay shrieking on the ground as the Shifters pointed and snickered.

  "Don't worry, Zelda," Wanda comforted. "She's had it coming for a long time."

  "Um… well."

  I blew out a frustrated breath. I couldn't leave her like that. It was wrong. It felt really good in the moment, but in the long run it would kind of suck. Blondie pathetically tried to hide her hairless head and missing breasts.

  "Get up," I snapped.

  I might have a semblance of a heart, but I wasn't stupid. I could be a kind witch, but I would be a kind witch with huge balls. My tone was strong and my stance e
ven stronger. Blondie crawled to her feet and kept her head bowed.

  "You're a skanky ho and if you ever challenge me again, this nice new look will be permanent. Do you follow me?"