Were Me Out: Shift Happens Book Four Read online

  Giles’ beady eyes narrowed to even angrier slits as his mate cackled at the insult hurled at her husband. “Shut your damn mouth,” he snapped at her.

  “Make me,” she hissed and spit at him.

  Ignoring her, Giles lunged forward. “You ready to die, boy?” he growled into the camera. “̓Cause I plan on taking you out and expanding my territory. I’ve always liked Georgia.”

  “Interesting,” Junior said with a wide smile that only seemed to incite Giles. “Cause I plan on taking you out and handing your territory over to someone with an IQ higher than ten.”

  “Watch your mouth and enjoy your final days,” Giles snarled.

  “But I didn’t accept your kind entreaty yet,” Junior reminded the idiot.

  “What?” Giles asked, looking confused. “Speak English.”

  “My bad,” Junior apologized. “Your insane behest. Your death-inducing petition. Your jackhole bidding. Your douchenozzle plea. Do you understand any of those, you half-witted mongrel?”

  Now both Giles and Gina looked confused—confused and pissed. Not attractive and somewhat terrifying.

  Hank stared at the ceiling and tried not to laugh, but Jack didn’t look pleased. Junior was yanking on the tails of some very sadistic whackjobs. I was leaning toward his dad’s assessment at the moment.

  “I accept your challenge,” Junior said in a loud, slow voice one would use on someone hard of hearing.

  “Do you have a mate yet?” Gina asked in a petulant voice as she continued to eyeball Junior like he was a piece of juicy steak.

  “I do not.”

  “That’s so sad,” she purred and bared her fangs. “I would have enjoyed tearing her to bits and spitting down her neck after I tore her head off. It would have been fun.”

  That was certainly unwelcome and gross news.

  “Guess you’re just gonna have to have a go at Jim-Bob Adams,” Junior replied looking at her with such disgust she actually grew uncomfortable.

  “The Panther? He’s not dead yet?” Giles asked, surprised.

  “Not dead. Not planning on dying any time soon either,” Junior informed him with a shrug. “We done here? ̓Cause I gotta wash my nuts and do some reading.”

  “You’ll come to us,” Giles snapped, clearly not happy with being dismissed so casually and rudely.

  “No can do, buttmunch,” Junior said with an exaggerated yawn. “You challenged. I pick the venue. Them’s the rules, Miles.”

  “Giles,” the idiot corrected him.

  “That’s what I said.”

  “No, you said Miles.”

  “Nope,” Junior replied innocently. “I said rancid gen-i-tiles.”

  “No you didn’t,” Giles shot back trying to figure out if he was being insulted or if Junior was as daft as he was.

  “Enough,” Gina shouted, shoving Giles out of the frame. “I don’t care who you have as your second. I’ll kill them then I’ll use you and your pretty body till I’m bored and then I’ll kill you—real slow. We’ll get Georgia and you’ll get a shallow grave. Easy peasy.”

  “Lookin’ forward to it,” Junior said flatly. “My parents’ property. Sundown. Two days.”

  “Ohhhhh,” Gina squealed. “We’ll bring down a moving truck because that fancy house is gonna be my new residence.”

  “Dream on,” Junior said, lifting his middle finger to the pair as he clicked the computer off.

  “That was down right stupid,” Hank said with a shake of his head. “You riled those murdering dumbasses up.”

  “Riled up means sloppy,” Junior said calmly. “Sloppy is a whole lot easier to kill than Werewolves on their game. Hank go talk to Jim-Bob and tell him to be ready.”

  “On it,” Hank replied.

  “You’re brilliant,” I told Junior, grabbing him and holding him tight.

  “Mensa, baby… and I have a whole lot to live for,” he whispered in my ear. “You stay safe. I love you so much it hurts.”

  Holding back the sob caught in my throat was difficult, but I succeeded. I was the Alpha’s mate and I was strong and proud—or at least I’d fake it till I could make it.

  Junior backed away from me and the wondrous magic that never failed to humble me filled the room.

  Junior’s skin turned to fur and his bones shifted with the ease of our kind. His beautiful body became what it was meant to be. His wolf—strong, beautiful and magical. Junior’s coat was a shiny chocolate brown and he was enormous, but his eyes were still the same dazzling green. I’d recognize him in any form.

  His shift was seamless and his wolf stared at me long and hard. Every instinct I had burned to shift and go with him, but I couldn’t. He didn’t want me to. And I didn’t want to distract him or make him lose the challenge.

  As horrible as it was, my job was to do absolutely nothing. The only way I could protect him was to stay away from him—and I would. I loved him far too much to fight him on this.

  Watching him lope silently out of his house and sprint into the woods splintered part of my heart. Essie took my hand and quietly led me to her car.

  I’d go to my parents’ house. I wouldn’t see Junior.

  But there was no way in hell I was going to do nothing.

  No way in hell.

  Our town’s deputies, Duke and Bubba sat with my brother Caleb at my parents’ kitchen table chowing down like they’d never seen food before. They were on their eighth box of cereal when I got my brilliant idea. After Essie dropped me off, I’d spent two hours rearranging my mom’s bookshelves into the Dewy Decimal System, much to her dismay, before I gave up and put them back into order by author and genre.

  I’d eaten part of a cheesecake, took apart the toaster, reassembled it, and was now eyeing her homemade blueberry muffins and the garage door opener. It was after that when the dummies’ conversation about the merits of mixing Frosted Flakes with Captain Crunch sparked my plan.

  How? I don’t know, but it did.

  Amazingly neither Bubba nor Duke seemed to realize I was a mated woman, but they weren’t Wolves—they were Lions—and idiots. However, Caleb kept giving me weird looks, but thankfully my brother stayed mum on the subject.

  “Have any of you guys killed anyone?” I asked.

  Choking on his cereal combo, Caleb glanced over at me like I’d grown three heads. “What in tarnation kind of question is that?” he demanded.

  “A legit one,” I shot back as I poured myself a bowl of crunchy sugar and made myself comfortable at the table.

  “Not that I’m proud of it, but yes,” Bubba admitted. “It was him or me. No choice.”

  “That’s the only reason to kill,” Duke said with a mouthful. “Or if someone is gunning for your own.”

  “Or if they put an empty milk container back in the fridge,” Bubba added giving Duke the stink eye.

  “Awwwww, come on. It was only once,” Duke bitched. “You’ve left me without toilet paper too dang many times to count.”

  “TMI,” I said to the boys.

  “Sorry, Sandy,” Duke apologized. “But he did. If he does it again, I’m getting a new roommate. The nard hole is a slob.”

  “Says the jackwad who put his phone in the microwave because he dropped it in the sink when he was doing the dishes—for once in his sorry-ass life,” Bubba countered with raised eyebrows.

  “Seriously?” I asked Duke.

  “Umm…yes.”

  “How’d that turn out?” I tried not to laugh, but failed. Who in the hell tried to microwave a damn phone?

  “Not good. Not good at all,” he admitted with a grin and a shrug. “It was an awesome explosion though. Blew the roof right off the house.”

  “Pardon me while I digress back to answer your question, my sister. I’m in the military,” Caleb said, watching me intently. “Yes. I’ve killed. Why? You plannin’ on offing someone?”

  “Not really…well, maybe—kinda,” I answered.

  “OUT,” Caleb said to his buds. “Me and my too-smart-for-her-own-britche
s sister have to have a talk.”

  “But there’s more cereal,” Bubba complained pointing at the other six boxes that they had lined up for demolition.

  “Take ‘em with you,” Caleb said, loading them down and pushing them out of the door. “Meet you at the pool hall tonight. And I’m paying. I owe you for the Johnson display.”

  “Oh my hell, that was your idea? You dared them to bare it in the town square?” I asked as I choked on my bite of cereal.

  “Yep,” Caleb said with a nod of his head. He pounded me on the back to get the Captain Crunch down. “I was freakin’ joking with those dorks. Didn’t think they were dumb enough to do it. I was wrong.”

  “Yep you were,” I told him with a giggle. “Those two will get naked at the drop of a hat. If there’s money involved, forget about it.”

  “True, but their earnings did go to charity,” Caleb said as he sat back down and crossed his arms over his massive chest. “You got something you wanna share?”

  “Umm…no?”

  “Umm…try a yes. I can tell you mated with Junior, but since you didn’t run into the room screamin’ it at the top of your girly lungs, I figured something was off. But if you’re wantin’ to kill Junior, I have to weigh in and say that’s probably not your best idea. Now if he did something shitassy to you, I’ll go on over and give him a thorough beat down. But I still don’t think you should off his sorry ass.”

  “I don’t want to kill Junior. Someone else does,” I told him.

  “Who?” he demanded standing up and knocking over the chair he was sitting in. “I’ve been itchin’ to smackdown on someone my entire vacation. Give me a name and an address and I’ll take care of the problem. Junior is family now, not to mention he’s the dang Alpha. It would give my ass great pleasure to eliminate a problem for him.”

  “You can’t,” I said morosely, loving my little brother even more for being so quick to jump to my defense—and Junior’s. Albeit, it was because it meant he could beat the hell out of someone, but Werewolf love tended to the violent side. “He’s been challenged.”

  “You’re shittin’ me,” Caleb said in disbelief.

  “I wish. Giles Giles is challenging him—says he forfeited the right when he didn’t step up years ago,” I explained, still smarting from feeling like I was responsible.

  My brother put his hands in his hair and bounced his knees. If I didn’t know him, I’d think he was upset—or weird. He wasn’t—well he was weird—but this was what he did when he was in deep thought. Rare, but he did actually think on occasion.

  “Jesus Hesus Christ,” he shouted, coming out of his brain trance. “That means you’ll have to fight that skank Gina Giles. What in the hell were you thinking, Sandy? She’s gonna eat you alive.”

  “Stop right there,” I snapped and told him the whole story.

  “Slap some butter on my butt and call me a biscuit,” he said with whistle of appreciation at the plan. “Junior is all kinds of ballsy brilliant. I agree with him about you not cutting your teeth with Gina Giles. However, you’re now gonna learn how to fight hand-to-hand. Knives are good and you’re goddang outstanding with them, but they don’t work all the time.”

  “Great. When are you gonna teach me how to really fight?” I asked.

  “How bout now?” he replied with a grin as he cracked his knuckles and prepared to kick my ass.

  “Sounds good to me,” I shot back with a grateful grin. “And don’t go easy on me. This is life or death we’re talking here.”

  “So you want me to kill you?” he asked with a laugh.

  “Well no, lardass. Junior would be pissed. Not to mention mom and dad would have a few issues with that,” I shot back.

  “This is not something you’re gonna hear me say often, so listen close. I love you, you little shit. Junior is the man for you, but being a helpless female doesn’t suit you. And yep, I’m aware you could remove my pecker with a carving knife from fifty yards, but you don’t always have a carving knife on you.”

  “True that,” I said, grinning. Caleb wasn’t one for messy emotions, admitting he loved me was all kinds of sweet and awesome.

  “So short of killing you, I’m gonna make you hurt until I’m satisfied you can hold your own. Deal?”

  “Deal.”

  I had the best family ever. It wasn’t every brother that would beat you to a pulp to save your life.

  Chapter Eleven

  “Dangit Sandy, you have to hit me back. Quit goin’ round your ass to get to your elbow and come at me like you mean it,” Caleb growled as he pulled me up off the ground for the umpteenth time.

  Normally I loved my parent’s back yard. I’d always thought the grass was so soft and comfortable to lie in. Not today.

  My nose was bleeding, my lip was split and I had bruises all over my body. I knew I would heal quickly. The tingling in my lips told me they were already mending back together, but this fighting to the death shit hurt.

  Caleb took me for my word and was training me like I was going into the military. I was positive I looked like ten miles of bad road, but I was still standing—kind of.

  Thankfully my parents weren’t home to witness my ass kicking. My dad would have smacked down on Caleb without asking questions first. My parents expected this kind of rough housing between my brothers, but not with me—I was the girl. Well, the girl needed these hand- to-hand skills if they didn’t kill her first.

  Both my parents had been wildly thrilled about my mating and understood and agreed with the plan Junior had come up with. We all were on the same page about keeping the secret until the challenge was over. Explaining the part about me doing nothing left a sour taste in my mouth, but I could see in my mom’s gentle eyes that she was supremely grateful to Junior for protecting me.

  I, on the other hand, was not happy at all that I couldn’t protect my man the same way he protected me.

  After all the hugs, kisses and congratulations, they had a few errands to run and would be home late in the afternoon. That left plenty of time for Caleb to bust on my butt and for me to heal before they got back.

  “I did hit you. I just don’t think your lard ass felt it,” I complained and wiped the blood from my nose with his sleeve just to piss him off. If I couldn’t bruise him, I may as well mess up his clothes. “And why are we doing this in human form? Don’t we shift for a challenge?”

  “Butthole, there’s a lot you don’t know for being so smart,” Caleb said as he tucked my messy hair behind my ear and winced at the damage he’d done to my face. “A challenge takes place in several parts. First, hand-to-hand in human form. If the winner of hand-to-hand chooses not to kill the opponent or if it’s a draw, you shift and go another round.”

  “Till someone gives up?” I asked.

  “Nope, if it goes to the shifting round, it’s to the death. You can only take the opponent prisoner and deliver a punishment when you’re in human form,” he explained.

  “Like when the Tinas got shunned for the kidnapping plot with the Dragons,” I said.

  “Exactly,” he replied, handing me an ice pack to put on my face. “Shunning is worse than death.”

  “Is there anything worse than shunning?” I questioned, happily accepting the ice.

  Caleb put his hands in his hair and went back to think-mode. After a few lovely non-violent minutes I had my answer.

  “I suppose permanently taking someone’s shifting ability away would be the top choice. But I’ve never heard of a way to do that.”

  “Junior developed a serum to prohibit a shift, but it’s not permanent,” I said thoughtfully as my brain wheels started turning fast.

  “Little sister, you mated with a mad scientist. But what the hell, you’re as brainiac-y cray-cray as he is. Your kids are gonna be freaks. And on that scary note, I’m thinking we should take a break. You look like you’ve been chewed up and spit out a few times,” he said as he walked me over to the picnic table and gently made me sit.

  “I’m not very go
od at this,” I admitted, dropping my gaze to the table.

  “No turdface, you’re not,” Caleb concurred and ran a frustrated hand through his hair. “Maybe you just need to think real hard about something you hate—or someone you hate. Maybe gettin’ pissed will help.”

  “She hates me,” a familiar female voice called out as she strutted across the back yard with purpose. “Let her fight me.”

  “Oh shit,” I mumbled and closed my eyes.

  And unbelievably the day got worse instantly.

  Sadie Wilson was here.

  “Does she know you’re mated to Junior?” Caleb whispered as he moved to stand in front of me.

  “I’m thinking she might by the glare she’s giving me,” I whispered back. “Or she has a very good hunch.”

  “Want me to get rid of her?”

  The thought was appealing, but I really was a grown up now. I could fight my own battles—or at least this one I could. Sadie was basically my mother-in-law, for better or worse. From the look on her face we were in for one of the worse times.

  “To what to we owe this shocking surprise?” I asked as I stood. I stepped out from behind my over-protective brother who had just kicked my ass for the last two hours.

  “I had to hear from Hank that you and Junior are mated?” she practically shouted with her hands on her hips.

  “Hank told you?” I asked, surprised.

  We did agree to tell family. Shit.

  “Well, not exactly. I had a feeling so I threatened him until he gave in,” she informed me with pride.

  That didn’t sound like Hank at all. He was as tough as nails and as honorable as they came. Threatening didn’t work on people like Hank.

  “What the hell did you threaten him with?” I could think of very little that would break Hank.

  “I informed him I was moving in with him and Essie. I even packed my bags and put them in his vehicle,” she answered with a raised brow and a delighted grin.

  “Well, that would certainly do it,” I muttered followed by a shudder. “So are you here to yell at me or what?”

  “No, not exactly,” she said as she fidgeted a bit.